The Little Things

I am sitting here, cleaning off my desk, organizing more, wondering if it will EVER be done.   The renovation project is nearing the end, and I am in the very last stages.  I am labelling drawers and closets, sorting papers, creating a space for scrapbooking and art, finances and education.  As I work, I ponder the blessing that this room is to our family.  

Not only was it built by our very own hands, but my husband designed it.  This GREAT room serves as a family room, a classroom, an art workshop, a sewing room, and a communication centre.  We are connected here - to one another through our family times, and to the world through the internet.  

It's a bright space, with eleven windows.  It's an airy space, with a cathedral ceiling.  Yet it's a cosy space, with warm dark brown flooring, and couches that invite you to curl up and read.  

I love this room, and the family that built it.  I love looking at the painted walls, the trimmed ceilngs, the new laminate flooring, and thinking about all of the little details that went into the renovations.

Today, after Linda wrote her blog, she called me over to read it.  I sat down at her computer, and the pain in my neck warned me that I couldn't stay in that position for long.  I stood, and read, and as I finished, I marvelled that my desk is 2 and a half inches shorter than Linda's, and that makes all the difference.

When Daniel built my desk, he built the desktop to fit onto my existing drawers, from a rather short old desk I had.  It fits me perfectly, and the placement of my monitor is just right.  I can look at the monitor without hurting my neck.

He built the kids' desks approximately 2.5 inches higher.  They're just the right height for my tall children - but just a bit too high for me.  This wasn't planned, by Daniel, or any of us.  But God, Who is rich in mercy, took care of that little detail.  He guided my son as he sawed and drilled and screwed the desks in place.  And He ordained that my desk would be at the perfect height for me.

The little things matter.  God blesses us in the work we do.

  Deut. 2:7 For the Lord your God has blessed you in all the work of your hands. 

Renovation Update - Almost there!

The floor is laid.  Well, mostly.  The beautiful laminate flooring is finished, but we still have ceramic tile to lay where the wood stove will be located, plus at the back door entrance.  

We still have to build the steps and lay laminate flooring on them.  We have to finish moving the corner shelves for the television and dvd player.  

This is the rest of the list:

• install trim around the windows.
• finish the spot over the library door.
• brick a wall (that's for Matthew)
• install the chimney & wood stove
• touch up paint in a few spots
• build desks for the kids
• set up the computers
• hang the chalkboard
• bring in books, etc., that are under the tarp outside 
• move the fish tank
• hang some pictures

We are so close to being done.  I am beginning to get excited, because this room is going to be my favourite room in the whole house.  After all, my husband built it, and my sons and daughters renovated it.  There's been a lot of labour and a lot of love poured into our "Great Room".  It will be functional, family oriented, and a great place in which to welcome folks and demonstrate love to them.  We plan to use this room for co-op homeschool, for Bible studies, for entertaining, and for family gatherings.

I honestly can hardly wait.  As soon as everything is brought back in, I will be able to post some pictures so you can share in our joy.  Meanwhile, I will update this list so you can watch the progress.

You can check my previous post, Reno List, to see what we've done lately.

This verse is applicable as we near the end of this long project:

Galatians 6:9  And let us not be weary in well doing: 

for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

Feminism - who needs it?

I once was a feminist. For a very short time, in high school, and in college, I thought that women were just as smart and just as capable as any man. "I can do anything he can do better, I can do anything better than he!" was my mantra. (For those of you younger than I am, that really was a popular song in the 60's.) I viewed my mother, who stayed at home during my growing up years, with a wee bit of contempt. I read Ayn Rand, and thought that her rabid feminism was right on. I was sorry for women who were "stuck in the home", and thought they were wasting their lives.

Surprisingly, I didn't act on my feminist views. I got married at the ripe old age of 18, and worked until my first child was born. I was blown away by how much I loved this little blonde beauty, with her sparkling blue eyes and tinkling laughter. Being a mom was great! It banished all thoughts of career or self-advancement. I was content to be the centre of Adeena's world.

Although I worked outside the home for a short time when Adeena was two, I soon conceived baby #2. It was during that pregnancy that God turned my world upside down, by calling me unto Himself and revealing to me Who He IS. Suddenly, being a mommy was a calling. It became my role and my blessing, as well as my joy.

My first baby will be 33 later this year. I went on to have 12 beautiful children, each one unique, each one precious.

My child-bearing years are over, and I have to say that I have no regrets.

I graduated at the top of my class in a prestigious boarding school. I was accepted into a major university. The world was my oyster, so to speak.

Yet instead of pursuing a medical degree, I settled down to bear children and guide my house. I carried them, birthed them, nursed them, trained them and taught them. Most important, I loved them.

I also, through it all, loved my husband. My early feminist views were a source of strife in our marriage in the early years. I expected my husband to help me with chores or dishes or laundry when I was overwhelmed with exhaustion during some of those pregnancies. I became resentful and angry when he didn't do what I expected him to do.

I also considered myself far more spiritual than he was. I didn't respect him as I should have. I thought highly of my own abilities, and figured "I could do anything better than he..."

I have feminism to thank for a lot of strife in those early years.

However, I have to say that God is a gracious God. He slowly and patiently taught me what it is to be a godly woman. I learned, along with that, to be a godly wife and mother. Through many toils and snares and trials and dangers, He led me and taught me His way.

I learned that the demands of feminism are foolish. There is no joy in wanting to control the world. Corporate boardrooms are full of strife and competition, stress and long hours. Why would I want that?

My home has been my castle for nearly 35 years. I have been the Queen, serving alongside the King of our little realm. I get to decide my schedule. I manage a group of other people. I encourage them to learn and to use their talents to glorify God. I am mother, nursemaid, decorator, cook, laundress, confidante, counsellor, gardener, assistant carpenter, teacher, seamstress, and so on. The list truly is endless. I have been able to develop my talents and pour my life into those people that I love the most in this world. How could I have been more blessed?

Phyllis Schlafly recently gave a talk at DePaul University in Illinois. The homemaker-turned-attorney raised six children and didn't get her law degree until after the age of fifty. At eighty, she is still growing strong. She believes that women should be given every opportunity to achieve success; she also believes that feminism is incompatible with happiness.

Read an article in the Chicago Daily Observer here: http://cdobs.com/archive/our-columns/phyllis-schlafly-was-right855/

My life isn't over at 53. I have plenty of years left before I reach the age that Phyllis Schlafly is. At this point, I am content to be a helper to my husband and a mother to my children. Some day, perhaps doors will open in other areas - missions, writing, publishing...who knows? Until then, I consider myself most blessed.

Most blessed, and very happy.

Serving the Lord - Reasonable Service.

I remember all too well how I "served the Lord" as a young mother by rising early each morning and dragging my three little ones out of bed to drive 25 minutes to our church/school so I could drop off my children in daycare and drive the Christian School bus (for free - they never paid me) to pick up the children to go to the Christian school. I would pop into the daycare and nurse my baby, then work in the library Monday to Friday, cataloging books and assisting teachers (not being paid). Then I would jump in the bus and do the hour-long run again, then pick up my poor children and head home. I was EXHAUSTED, but I thought I was "serving the Lord". My intentions were good, but I didn't know the Bible very well. I was a baby Christian, and I thought the sacrificial service was what God required of me.

But God is so gracious. He was gracious enough to give me a massive breast infection. I was so sick and so sore, I couldn't move off of my bed. I called out to God in my pain, then read in Timothy, "I would that the younger women marry, bear children, and guide the house."

I wasn't guiding the house. I had married at a young age (18) and I had borne three beautiful children, but I was away all day, Monday to Friday, and someone else was raising them.

The day I finally learned that I should be home honestly felt like Jesus sat at the end of my bed and explained it to me. I listened, and I understood for the first time that my place was to be in the home, caring for my children and my husband. Not long after that Epiphany, we moved, and I told the leaders in the church that I would no longer be driving the school bus or working in the library. You would have thought I had blasphemed, or murdered a child, or worse.

The leaders (pastors, deacons, associate pastors) should have told me, a young Christian mother, that my place was in the home, and that it was a high calling to be a keeper at home. Instead I was made to feel guilty for wanting to do what God had called me to do.

Thankfully, my husband was stubborn enough that when he heard my explanation and caught the vision of me being home and keeping my home, he stated adamantly that his wife would be remaining at home. They found someone else to do the jobs and I stayed at home with my children.

Blessed mother and wife that I am, I remained at home for the next 25 years. Most of you know that I did go out and work part time (two days per week) for a ministry near and dear to my heart. My homeschooling children were 17, 15, 13, 11, 9 and 6, and I thought that the older ones were capable and skilled enough to run the home while I was gone.

It did NOT work. I knew after a few months, but when I approached those in charge to ask if I could cut back to one day a week, or work from home, I was told that I was NEEDED, and that they could not get along without me. I tried again, a few months later. Finally, my stress level was so high that I was not sleeping at night. I felt guilty. I was neglecting my children, and I knew it, and they knew it. But no matter how much I pleaded with God and mentioned to others that my desire was to be home, nothing changed.

Until exactly one year ago, tomorrow. That Thursday night I was on my way home, having worked my two days. I had a trunk full of groceries because it was my habit to stop for groceries on the way home, thus eliminating another day away from my family. I was only about 15 minutes from home when an elderly man made a terrible mistake and turned right without looking, into MY lane.

You can read about the accident, here: http://grannymom.blogspot.com/2007/02/no-accident.html

And you can rejoice with me, that God's mercies never fail. He used the accident to shake my world and to make me examine my priorities. He used the accident to make me unable to continue driving to work and sitting at a computer. He used the accident to bless our family abundantly.

Ladies, the leadership of your churches is not always right. Read the Word. Examine your heart before God. Remember, Jesus said that His yoke is easy and His burden is light. I work just as hard here at home as I did when I worked away, yet I delight in my work and take joy in my tasks. I enjoyed my work at the ministry, too, but my stomach was always in knots and I felt torn. I had at the back of my mind a running list of questions: "Are the kids alright? Are they doing their schoolwork? Did they remember to feed the animals? Did they take something out of the freezer for supper? Are they getting along?"

The biggest confirmation I have that I am right to stay home is when my six foot tall son gathers me into his arms and tells me, "It's not the same when you're not home, Mommy! I am so glad you aren't going out to work any more."

And I'm glad, too!

In Christ,
Janet

God, Who Made the Earth and Heaven

Words: Reginald Heber, verse 1; Frederick Hosmer, verse 2; William Mercer, verse 3.


1. God, who made the earth and heaven,
darkness and light;
Who the day for toil hast given,
for rest the night;
May Your angel guards defend us,
slumber sweet Your mercy send us;
Holy dreams and hopes attend us,
all through the night.

2. When the constant sun returning
unseals our eyes,
May we, born anew like morning,
to labor rise;
Fit us for the task that calls us;
let not ease and self enthrall us,
Strong through You what'er befall us,
O God most wise!

3. And when morn again shall call us
To run life's way,
May we still, what'er befall us,
Thy will obey.
From the power of evil hide us,
In the narrow pathway guide us,
Nor Thy smile be e'er denied us
The live-long day.

At the end of a busy day, it is good to pause and reflect on God's Sovereignty and mercy in allowing us to be productive this day.

Let's see: The laundry is caught up. I think we did about 8 loads of laundry today. Rick's sock drawer is absolutely full! YEAH!

We enjoyed home-made tomato rice soup for lunch, and had a chicken dinner for supper.

The van is gassed up and ready to go for church in the morning.

Joel came and laid the rest of the floor in the laundry room.

My bedroom is almost clean. I don't have much left to do.

I figured out how to use my new labelling machine, and I am starting to label EVERYTHING: Christmas Wrap. Regular Wrapping paper. Please Remove Boots or Shoes. That sort of thing.

Yes, we had a good day. I am thankful that God will watch over us this night, and that tomorrow, Lord willing, we will have another day that has its joys and its sorrows. Knowing that God is smiling upon us gives meaning and contentment to each and every activity.

Happy Birthday, Joanna! You are the precious mother to Kaleb and Kaitlyn, and a beloved wife to our son, Matt. May you have many, many more birthdays!

Laundry, laundry and more laundry...

The thing about having 12 kids is that you very quickly figure out that doing laundry has to be more than a once a week task. Even though 5 of our children are now married, with 9 of us still living at home, there is still a LOT of laundry to do.

I have a system. I have taught everyone, even Christopher, how to do a load of laundry. Sorting is essential: you must separate whites from darks, and very soiled clothes from slightly dirty clothes. Using pre-spot or some other spray for stains is also very important.

I have rules: never put on a load of washing without taking the clothes from the dryer, folding them, and putting them away. That way, clothes are not left in baskets to get wrinkled, and there is no build-up of unfolded clothes in the laundry room. I know how easily that can happen. We have climbed the Mount Everest of laundry many a time. We don't want to do that again.

I have a schedule. The boys do laundry on certain days; the girls do laundry on other days. Nobody is allowed to take laundry into the laundry room unless it is their turn and they are going to wash it, dry it, fold it, and put it all away. They each have hampers in their own rooms, which again eliminates Mount Everest!

And now, TA DA!... I have a nice, new, shiny, clean laundry room. I was thinking today that in all my years of doing laundry, I have never had such a nice room in which to do it.

Darlene's son Joel took it upon himself to surprise me just before Christmas. He had his mother take me out for a nice lunch, and he scurried to my house and completely renovated my horrible laundry room. He washed walls, drywalled, mudded, painted, installed new light fixtures, and put in a new tile floor. It is completely organized now, and when I go in there to do an umpteenth load of laundry, my heart sings! How I have been blessed by this young man, who simply had a desire to bring a little order (and joy!) to my life.

I always have enjoyed seeing the stacks of clean clothes or towels, ready to be put to use by my family. I love to see drawers full to the brim with socks or sweaters, all nice and clean! But now, even the process of achieving those stacks of clean clothes is delightful, thanks to my good friend, Joel.

Joel has learned to bless others by serving them with the talents God has given him. May God richly bless him in all of his endeavours.

When Satan Tempts me to Despair...

When Satan tempts me to despair,
and tells me of the guilt within,
upward I look and see Him there
Who made an end to all my sin.

I am a Patriarch's Wife, and proud of it. I am glad to be a stay-at-home mom, caring for my husband, my family, my home. I feel privileged to be in this position, and I aspire to greatness. My desire is to do well before the Lord, and to teach my children to do well, too.

The trouble is, I live in an old farmhouse that is constantly and continually under construction. Our basement is unusable -- dirt floor, river running through, very damp. We have very little storage in the house, and only a few closets. We have tried very hard to weed out unnecessary possessions, but many of us are pack-rats and we still have 9 people living here. Five of those are six feet or taller, so we're all big. The logistics of caring for off-season clothes, for instance, with no closet space and an unusable basement are overwhelming. Then to add to it, some of us (especially ME) are bookaholics, and we treasure our books. It is hard to weed out the books, because we LOVE them.

Recent renovations began last year, when Rick and I were on a two-day getaway. My sweet Linda decided to do a "while you were out" and took everything out of the family room. Books, hundreds of them, got stuck in a hallway, stacked in the upstairs hallway, etc.

Then we decided to change our "school at home" classroom into a family oriented learning and living space. We got rid of desks, made shelves for the books, got rid of piles and piles of computer paraphernalia (Rick is no longer a computer guy...he's now a trucker) and everything was beginning to look great.

That's when Rick decided to take out the 42-foot wall of windows (harvested from an old school building, single pane, and not conducive to keeping out the cold) and rebuild it, installing good windows and insulation and vapour barrier, etc. Great plan, but the timing was exactly backwards. We had to pull the newly built shelves away from that long wall. Books got stacked, again.. Chaos ensued.

So, what am I living in? An old farmhouse, with boxes and Rubbermaid containers stacked all over the place. I am trying to find all the necessary receipts for my husband's upcoming audit. Files and papers are stacked all over the computer area. Boxes of books are still piled high, but now there is insulation on top of that. Pieces of drywall await installation. There is a sink/counter on my kitchen table, awaiting installation in the newly built bathroom. (I forgot to mention that. The bathroom floor was spongey and dangerous, so in January my son Matthew ripped it out. that led to the rebuilding of the entire bathroom. Almost there, 11 months later...)

This is NOT the picture I have of a Patriarch's Wife. I want to be hospitable. I want order. I want my husband to be proud of me. I want to be a good example to my daughters. I want to open my mouth with kindness and wisdom, not with irritation due to the stress of living in this environment.

Satan, the Accuser, doesn't have to look very far to see weakness here. It's obvious when you walk through the door. Everything is in disarray. The living room is the only room in the house that is presentable...and it's not perfect, either. Satan sits on my shoulders, saying, "You really aren't a good wife. Look at this house! You can't even keep socks in Rick's drawer. And why don't you have all of the filing done? You should have been able to just walk to the drawer and pull out a file with all of the necessary information. You're a failure." (I hang my head in shame. I have to agree.)

He goes on, "You really aren't a very good mother, either. You are so busy getting the filing done, you haven't even started Christmas shopping. What about baking cookies with your children? And you haven't even purchased a snowsuit for your son. How's he supposed to enjoy the snow? You were short-tempered with the children yesterday when they were just laughing and playing. What a bad mom you are." (I hang my head in shame... I have to agree, again.)

This morning I woke up thinking about all of this reality, and I was sorely tempted to despair. Tears were near the surface. The weight of the world was on my shoulders. I thought of Stacy, and Debbie, and Jennie, and all of those ladies who seem to have it all together, and compared myself to them. Woe is me. "I will never measure up", I thought.

Frustration and anger were near the surface of my mind, about to spill out into my behaviour with my husband and my children bearing the brunt, then the Holy Spirit brought to my mind one of the songs we sing in church:

When Satan tempts me to despair,
and tells me of the guilt within,
upward I look and see Him there
Who made an end to all my sin.

I began to think about my life and the reality of my marriage and family. Yes, I am a failure, compared to what I want to be or what others are...but I am a child of God. I am striving to please my Master, Jesus, and to bless and honour my head, Rick. When I think of Jesus, I see Him smiling down on me, pleased with my efforts, knowing my heart. He is able to deliver me from all of this chaos. He alone knows how long it will take to achieve our goal of an orderly home. He, Who stands before the Father, pleading for me, is on MY side. He will never leave me, nor forsake me. He is walking with me, helping me, as I sort through papers and direct my children and help my husband with his work.

The Christian life is one of repentance. Daily, moment my moment repentance. We need to acknowledge our weaknesses, and depend on Jesus to make our work count for His glory. In my many weaknesses I see how very needy I am, and how great the grace of God is toward me. He LOVES me. He knows my sin, my failures, my anxious moments. And He promised to meet all of my needs. ALL of them. Even this.

So, Satan...begone! I know I am a mess, but I serve a glorious Saviour. I know our home is not a showcase, but we love God here. We may not have our files in order, but we all sat together today and read the Bible, and prayed.

Thank YOU, Lord, for encouraging me through this little chorus. Thank You that You know my weaknesses, but you love me anyway. Thank You for never leaving me. Give me strength and courage to keep on keeping on this day. May I do it with a song of joy in my heart.

In Christ, I pray.
Amen.

Before The Throne Of God Above
Charitie Lees Bancroft, Vikki Cook


Verse 1:

Before the throne of God above,
I have a strong, a perfect plea,
A great High Priest whose name is "Love,"
Who ever lives and pleads for me.


Chorus 1:

My name is graven on His hands,
My name is written on His heart;
I know that while in heav'n He stands
no tongue can bid me thence depart.
No tongue can bid me thence depart.


Verse 2:
When Satan tempts me to despair,
and tells me of the guilt within,
upward I look and see Him there
Who made an end to all my sin.




Chorus 2:
Because the sinless Saviour died,
my sinful soul is counted free;
For God, the Just, is satisfied
to look on him and pardon me.
to look on him and pardon me.


Verse 3:
Behold him there! the risen Lamb,
my perfect, spotless Righteousness,
the great unchangeable I AM,
the King of glory and of grace!


Chorus 3:
One with Himself I cannot die,
My soul is purchased by His blood;
My life is hid with Christ on high,
with Christ, my Saviour and my God
with Christ, my Saviour and my God

©1997 PDI Worship (Admin. by The Copyright Company)
All rights reserved. International copyright secured.
CCLI song #2306412

Slander; libel - displeasing to God

I was rebuked yesterday by a well-meaning poster who wanted me to know the difference between slander and libel. One is saying something bad about someone else, with the intent to hurt or defame; the other is writing something bad, with the same intent.

Seems to me, a Christian should be more concerned about how she treats fellow Christians than about whether something is slander or libel.

My dear husband led us in Bible study this morning (as is his regular practice). We happen to be reading through 1 Corinthians, and this morning's reading was chapter 4. Paul explains that he is a servant of Christ, as all Christians ought to be. He is also a steward of the mysteries of God: it is his responsibility, as an apostle, to teach the gospel. He doesn't care about the judgment the Corinthians have placed on him. What matters to him is the Lord, the righteous Judge. He will bring to light the hidden things, and will reveal the purposes of men's hearts.

When a Christian attacks another, she or he ought to be very, very careful to seek the Lord and to examine his or her own heart before God. Ask, "why do I need to say this? Do I have all of the facts? Is it important? Will it further the kingdom of God?"

Paul goes on to say that he is a fool for Christ's sake. I would say that Stacy McDonald and Jennie Chancey are fools for Christ's sake. They are sending a message to Christian women that the best thing they can aspire to be is a keeper at home, ministering to their own husband and the children that God gives them. It is not a popular message, but it is the truth. God designed women to bear children, and this is the greatest thing they can do. Nothing compares to receiving "a man from the Lord". The miracle of childbirth, the secret formation of a baby in the womb, the fact that babies survive all of the many things that can go wrong in those nine months...all of these are miracles planned by the Living God. Serving one's husband with joy is a blessed thing, as is being loved and honoured and held in high esteem by that same husband.

I have a relative, through my husband, who is an accomplished writer. She is a researcher, a professor, a facilitator. She travels extensively and her work is in high demand worldwide. She recently confided to me that all she really wants to do is to stay home, to be with her husband, to enjoy their home together. That is the real appeal - not the hotel rooms and the praise and the acknowledgment.

Back to Stacy and Jennie: they are wise women. "Being reviled (they) bless; being persecuted (they) endure; being defamed, (they) entreat. (See 1 Cor. 4:12)

We ought to imitate these dear ladies, following them as they follow the Lord.

For a great essay on Slander, go here: My Miscellanies.blogspot.com

I am going to require my children to read this essay, and also read the other ones linked at the bottom of the page. Great homeschooling course, in my opinion.

Janet

Organizing

I spent the entire day organizing my desk. Now for a woman to spend that many hours organizing one little desk, said desk has got to be a dreadful mess.

I have to admit it was terrible. There were papers and books and cards and letters and bills and a calculator and pens and vocabulary cards and so on and so forth - clutter and mess. Sigh.

It is always my intention to be organized, to be consistent in decluttering and filing. However, I get busy and the next thing I know, there is a pile here and a boxful there. Part of my problem is that I like to KEEP things, just in case. I also am a lover of books, and can never bear to part with any of them. I tend to buy books at garage sales or secondhand book stores, and of course at conferences or special events. Most of my books are in good order on my very organized shelves(thanks to Linda!), but my desk often becomes a place to pile books I intend to read for my own pleasure or edification, as well as books I plan to read to the kids, or have them read.

I have been praying as I have organized my house, top to bottom. God does hear and answer prayer, often in unexpected ways. Matt and Joanna, for instance, spent the day after New Years' Day cleaning and organizing my living room. They got rid of the tree and all of the decorations, threw out junk, and rearranged the furniture. It looks terrific!

Then my dear friend Darlene sent some dressers she no longer had room for. They came exactly at the right time. I put them in my classroom and used them for storage. Two of the drawers hold hanging file folders - perfect! One thin drawer has all of my maps and posters. I used the top drawer for confiscated items (it is full of lego at the moment), and I have yet to fill two other drawers!

God is so good and so gracious. I looked at the disaster that I called a classroom at the beginning of the week, and I despaired, feeling overwhelmed with the amount of work that lay before me. But as we sorted and moved and cleaned and dusted and filed, my spirits have lifted and I really can visualize how great it will be to have the entire room in order. Our schedule will be far more easy to follow if we don't have to stop to look for that Latin book, or that set of math cards, or pencils and pens.

Now if I could only figure out how to post a picture, I'd show you what it looks like. But for now, I just am rejoicing as I sit at my CLEAN desk, and I am energized to finish up the last few things to get the rest of it done! YEAH!

Janet